In praise of the ordinary

Interior with Table, Vanessa Bell 1921

ordinary (adj.)

early 15c., "belonging to the usual order or course," from Old French ordinarie "ordinary, usual" and directly from Latin ordinarius "customary, regular, usual, orderly," from ordo (genitive ordinis) "row, rank, series, arrangement" (see order (n.)).

Sometimes clients come to us wanting to tap into something outside the ordinariness of their lives--something greater or somehow more meaningful or perhaps something that feels more important. And there is plenty of room for all of that in life. But we don't want to miss the beauty of the ordinary in all our striving for the meaningful and important.

Our work of helping clients tune into the the sacred and the meaningful, and our work of helping clients dive deep into the landscape of their psyche--this work requires us to be thoughtful guides. As such we can steer our clients in certain directions--directing them to recognize the beauty in the mundane, the sacredness in the ordinary, the numinous in the plain.

Life becomes a meditation, and a joyous one, when we can teach our clients to see their lives from the vantage point of the ordinary. When clients can learn to appreciate the gifts in the ordinary, they are simultaneously cultivating a sense of presence in the world as well as a deep appreciation for the gifts all around.

Clients will tolerate this at different levels. For very intense and high energy clients, this will be harder than for those who are more moderate in their energy. Clients who are already in touch with some aspects of their spirituality will more easily be able to connect to this skill.

However, it is a skill nonetheless and one that we have a responsibility as coaches, guides, and facilitators, to help our clients cultivate and develop. There is a groundedness that comes from an appreciation of the ordinary. And it can be meditative in a sense. Washing the dishes becomes a meditation. Chopping vegetables becomes an act of service. Noticing the hairline cracks in a porcelain teapot becomes a recognition of the paradox--the sacred that exists within the profane, the weak that exists within the strong.

In the Authentic Wholeness Coach Training Certification Program, we work on languaging and techniques that can be introduced to help clients make the ordinary sacred. I teach a process that helps clients tune into their soul-life through the ordinary. In the natural world, in natural materials, and in ordinary simple things, we can find the sacred. We can also connect to the anima mundi--the soul of the world.

Ordinary Life by Barbara Crooker

This was a day when nothing happened,  the children went off to school without a murmur, remembering their books, lunches, gloves.  All morning, the baby and I built block stacks in the squares of light on the floor.  And lunch blended into naptime,  I cleaned out kitchen cupboards,  one of those jobs that never gets done,  then sat in a circle of sunlight and drank ginger tea,  watched the birds at the feeder jostle over lunch's little scraps.  A pheasant strutted from the hedgerow,  preened and flashed his jeweled head.  Now a chicken roasts in the pan,  and the children return,  the murmur of their stories dappling the air.  I peel carrots and potatoes without paring my thumb.  We listen together for your wheels on the drive.  Grace before bread.  And at the table, actual conversation,  no bickering or pokes.  And then, the drift into homework.  The baby goes to his cars, drives them along the sofa's ridges and hills.  Leaning by the counter, we steal a long slow kiss,  tasting of coffee and cream.  The chicken's diminished to skin & skeleton,  the moon to a comma, a sliver of white,  but this has been a day of grace in the dead of winter,  the hard cold knuckle of the year,  a day that unwrapped itself like an unexpected gift,  and the stars turn on,  order themselves into the winter night.